Dealing With Anger in Your Divorce

Divorce and child custody cases inevitably lead to some complicated and unpleasant emotions. This is true not only for the adults involved in the case, but also their children. Before, during, and after the divorce or separation, the adults and the children may experience a higher degree of anxiety, instability, and anger then they ever have before. While it may be a normal reaction to experience anger during your family law case, it is also important to deal with anger from your spouse, from your child, or from yourself in a healthy way. man blowing smoke out of his ears

Seeing a child get angry about a divorce is very common, although it is difficult for any parent to observe and address. First, it is important for a parent with a child showing anger to be present and reliable for the child. Next, divorcing parents need to help the child understand the divorce is not their fault, and that both parents continue to love the child unconditionally. If the child makes angry or hurtful statements to a parent, the parent should not become defensive, but instead should react with understanding. Often a child can benefit from meeting with a school counselor or other mental health professional so they have a neutral place to explore and understand their emotions. Dealing with an angry spouse or co-parent can present its own set of difficulties for working through a divorce or custody case. An angry spouse or co-parent can often seem irrational, unpredictable, and even frightening to deal with. If your spouse or co-parent is exhibiting excessive anger, it is often advisable to stop face-to-face communication about hotly contested issues. Taking time to express your thoughts in writing and requesting your spouse do the same can allow each of you the breathing room necessary to keep a level head and to cool hot tempers.

Finally, people going through a divorce need to find ways to deal with their own anger issues, which are very common. It is normal to experience some anger during and after your family law case. Failure to deal with your anger issues and letting feelings of resentment fester can lead to poor decision making, especially in terms of settlement proposals or mediation. Do not be afraid to seek out counseling or support groups in order to help you process your anger.

If you are facing a divorce or custody case, there are many issues that require the attention of an experienced attorney. We have relationships with many experienced and reputable mental health professionals whose help can be key to moving during and after the divorce is completed. Contact us today at (651) 371-9117 so we can talk about your divorce and what we can do to help.